Little Arabian Sunshine
My mother happened to be in Riyadh on Mother’s Day last year. I didn’t know whether to think it was funny or sad that she and her lady friends, whose kids are of my generation, gathered one another and “invited each other out” for a Mother’s Day brunch, complete with gifts and all.
Cute, I guess, but this little incident reflects the ultimate truth about life in the Palestinian world of Saudi Arabia; there always comes a time when an entire generation goes away to college. This truth is so sharp and so severe that I really do not have the words to describe it. You just have to live through these cycles of change to really appreciate it’s importance; you have to grow up watching the older generations of kids disappear one at a time. You have to learn to classify families under labels pertaining to whether the kids of the family are at home or away, and live through dreading September when depressed parents would return from the summer holidays alone.
Most of the time, the generations get their degrees and return to work in Saudi Arabia. They usually stay with their families for a few years, then these kids would get married, usually to one another.
I spent most of my life watching these cycles go round and round. The internet makes it easy to track these cycles even as I participate in the “away” part; every day when I open Facebook, I see pictures of my friends in colleges and universities all across the world. I see the generation right above mine putting pictures of themselves getting married off to each other. I see pictures of the younger generation standing right where I stood, learning the dabkeh just like I learned it.
The latter pictures (one of which is above, I can’t believe those kids are old enough to remember routines) triggered this post. I miss the dabkeh days. Life was all about putting on the dabkeh shoes and dancing.
I miss that simplicity. I miss living in that tailor-made, perfect little universe where everyone is a cookie-cutter copy of everyone else. I miss the world where there are no misunderstandings, where everyone loves one another, and where there are never any ulterior motives. I miss the people I grew up with. I miss my dad’s Friday outings. I miss weekends by the pool. I miss the Ramadan tents. I miss shopping for the heck of it. I miss the first 18 years of my life.
I miss them a lot, but as my generation boots up to dive headfirst back into the cycle (I just discovered that a dabkeh person who was also my schoolmate is getting married), I know that I do not miss it enough to dive along, as tailor-made and as appealing as it may be.
We always laugh at how young we were when we look at the old Arabian Sunshine pictures.
I’m still really happy to know that’s there’s still a Lawee7 (below, check out his shoes). Let’s hope he’s as shater as Sami :)
Qwaider قويدر
April 29, 2007 @ 9:51 pm
That was awe inspiring Roba, beautiful sentiment and wonderfully well put
I lived through 3 such generations, and then became one! Not all people experience this severance .. And at the early ages of 16 or 17
It’s harder on anyone left behind, I feel. Those are the ones left with tons of memories, and no one to share them with …
At least, you’re lucky enough to be couple of hours away ….
Roba
April 29, 2007 @ 9:56 pm
Yeah, but it’s still away :)
Shaden
April 30, 2007 @ 1:36 am
Great post Roba! I think I can relate to the “depressed parents” part of the story. This is life you know, and I feel with my parents who have 3 kids (out of 6) currently away from home. One is married, one is working and one is…well, working/studying/finding out her way :-)
And I see the younger generation going to college and planning out their after-school life and my generation getting married as soon as they graduate from school.
Didn’t think I’d miss anything or anyone I used to know, since I taught myself not to get too attached to people or things but guess what, I do.
Isam
April 30, 2007 @ 9:23 am
U miss that ??? i hate that ! ya3ne i know everything ur talking about … i spent my 1st 12 years in KSA … and i am back here now and i know what it’s like because i have relatives here … maybe some people crave for simplicity but am not one of them … but roba u can find simplicity in alot of places but KSA is so twisted … alot of things that goes on here u will never see them anywhere … a country with 25 million people and not even one decent university !!!! ya3ne u can figure out by yourself how many families here are moving to Canada ,the states or jordan because of this problem alone … i feel sorry for the older husbands and wives who endure all of this crap and live here by themselves (or sometimes even the wives leaves with the kids and the man stays here by himself , sa7 ?) just because this country offers alot of money and is not expensive to live in … so they send their children around the world !!!
sorry for the long rant … but when anybody fires praise to KSA … i just cant help it i explode !
Mark
April 30, 2007 @ 10:24 am
Hello Roba,
I’m a long-time reader of your blog, first time poster, i think, This particular post just hit home with me bigtime. My family lived in the UAE and all 3 kids left to study in other countries, then parents moved back to Jordan, alone, now thats totally depressing, it almost makes us feel guilty for being away. You can just hear the loneliness in their voices when they speak of their memories in the UAE. Iv always thought that this was unique to our family, or with a limited group of people, but your post made me realize that this is more widespread than i previously thought.
Keep up the great effort.
Best wishes
The Observer
April 30, 2007 @ 5:01 pm
I guess the facebook can help. At least a bit. I love that site and how it connects me back with people who ran into my life 10 years or so ago.
7aki Fadi
April 30, 2007 @ 7:05 pm
The dabkeh brought some good memories.
Thanks Robz.
Sami Zaharna
May 2, 2007 @ 7:20 am
Wow. I can’t believe those kids are udboking now.
Those days were really, really nice. Dabkah taught me alot, in so many ways. It was good to be part of an organization and part of doing something when schools taught us to be stupid and not think.
Btw, who’s getting married?! e-mail me and let me know!